


Alien Hunter

by Thechildofnightmares



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: ? - Freeform, I’ll add more tags as I go, M/M, Mystery, teen and up for cursing and mention of death I guess, what fuckin uuuh tags do I put on this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24534412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thechildofnightmares/pseuds/Thechildofnightmares
Summary: Zim goes missing again, and Dib has to get on with his life while picking up the pieces of what Zim left behind... but suddenly he gets a lead.
Relationships: ? - Relationship, Dib & Zim (Invader Zim), Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Eek. This chapter’s a little exposition heavy boys. Sorry about that.

Dib Membrane sat in the back of his biomedical engineering class, his attention on the crinkled and ink smudged paper on the desk in front of him. The pen in his hand moved in short and quick motions, his mind somewhere else completely. He was sketching the blueprint to Tak’s ship, a design he had memorized years ago. The only reason he was sitting there in class was because this class had mandatory attendance.  
It was pretty ridiculous for a college class to have, in Dib’s opinion, but Dib couldn’t complain. His dad was paying for it, and all Dib had to do was go.  
They had made an agreement that, as long as Dib would get some type of engineering degree, he could work at his dad’s lab once he graduated, and he could do the paranormal research on the side. Dib took this as a chance to learn as much as he could about hypothetical biology, biomedical engineering, aerospace science, and anything else that could help him on his space adventures.  
He still held out hope he could convince his dad about aliens once he graduated college. Once he was able to work with his dad, it would be a piece of cake getting him in Dib’s ship so he could show him the galaxy and all the aliens therein. Right now, there was no chance getting a continuous 30 minutes around him without interruptions from his work.  
To be perfectly honest, Dib couldn’t see himself working with his dad. Yea, it was part of the plan, but hopefully if Dib did it right he wouldn’t have to work with him for too long. Dib would never admit this to his dad, though, because his dad would perfectly understand and come to the wrong conclusion. He would be a little sad his son didn’t want to work with him, and then transfer him to another branch of his company without a second thought. Dib knew that his dad would be happy as long as he got any “real” job whether it was related to his company or not, but his dad or his company wasn’t the problem. It was the job itself. It was working. Dib’s ideal not-very-well thought out plan currently consisted of him convincing his dad aliens are real, getting a patent on some flying machine within a week of starting the job, and then just doing his own personal research with that patent money for the rest of his life. Dib didn’t want to be tied down by work for the rest of his life like his dad was. Dib wanted to go on adventures in space and find ghosts and bigfeets and invent stupid gadgets to help him on his adventures in space to find ghosts and bigfeets.  
I mean, if the whole “exposing an alien and becoming head of the fbi and nasa” thing didn’t work out. Yes. Right. Of course. The thing he’s been working for since he was 12. Correct. Obviously. Duh. That was still his main objective for the future. Of course. But in case that didn’t work out.  
Right now, Dib just had to focus on getting through school. One step of a plan at a time. Get through school, some other steps, complete your life’s focus, live happily ever after. That’s all. No big deal. Don’t plan ahead too much. Someone might suddenly go missing and ruin all your efforts and previous plans. Don’t get your hopes too high, y’know? You never know what the world is going to throw at you, or, hypothetically, who’s going to abandon you on earth to live your sad little human existence alone to die to the cogs of capitalism at the fringe of human society without any hope of otherworldly escape while you scramble to piece everything back together in a way that still includes people respecting you without any proof of aliens or any friend-enemies that brought light or fun into your dark miserable boring life.  
These are perfectly healthy and utterly hypothetical thoughts to be having about your mindset and/or life, Dib told himself.  
Luckily, this was his first semester of the course, and Dib was raking in all A’s. He didn’t even need to be here. He had taught himself all of this when he was 14. Bioengineering was crucial when researching brain-computer backpack technology, and he had really studied it when researching a certain alien.  
He scribbled down some possible places for adding more food and drink storage to the ship when he heard a whisper to his right.  
“Dib. Dib. Hey Dib.” The familiar redhead whispered, snapping Dib from his brooding thoughts. Dib glanced over at his electronic-eyes classmate. “Shouldn’t you be paying attention, Keef?”  
“No, I already know all this. And I know you do too, so I know you can talk.” Keef whispered, leaning closer. It would make sense Keef would know this already, since Dib’s dad had gone over the basics with Keef when he made him those new eyes. Dib shivered. The memories of the dark harvest still gave him nightmares.  
The greasy boy sighed, dropping his pen. His tired eyes rose up to the boy sitting next to him. He didn’t bother about hiding his blueprints, Keef was plenty aware of the ship already. Probing questions like this were unavoidable from the red head, he had learned a long time ago. “Alright. Fine. What?”  
“What are you drawing?”  
“Blueprints.”  
“For your space ship?”  
“Yes.”  
“Isn’t it already fixed, though?”  
“Yes, but I need to add more compartments if I’m going to be using it for overnight investigations.”  
“Like paranatural stuff? Ghost hunting?”  
“Yes. I also want to make more room for installing ghost detecting gear.”  
“Neat. Hey, What’s that thing on your keychain?”  
Dib looked down. There was a small electronic on the end of the chain connected to his key ring. It looked something like a spark plug, except made of a bluish metal and covered in small bumps. The tip had a three pronged gripper, and it was lined with silver rings and alien text. It was nothing from earth, certainly.  
“Oh, Uh, it’s just a lucky charm I keep.”  
“That’s so cool. Is it a Zim thing?”  
Dibs posture stiffened. Zim had kinda been a sore subject since.. what had happened. The Latino boy let a sigh escape from his lips. Keef always did bring up Zim whenever he could, too. It was stressful, constantly avoiding those verbal landmines. It was a personality trait of his, at this point. Bringing up Zim, that is. Not as much of a personality trait as it was with Dib, though. “Yes.” Dib admitted. “It’s something I found in his lab right after he disappeared... again”  
Keef waved his hand and said a word of encouragement. Something about how Zim was probably fine wherever he was. Dib didn’t register it, or anything else of what Keef was prattling on about now. Dib suddenly wasn’t in a listening mood. His introspection was only pushed into a deeper state, away from his classmate. Keef continued to talk and talk and talk and talk and talk as Dib put two earbuds in his ears and clicked a random paranormal podcast on his phone. Dulcet tones spoke of ghosts and ghouls and drew his eyesight back to the paper in front of him. Dib wasn’t even pretending to pay attention, as Keef’s one sided conversation shifted to how cool his girlfriend was and how much he liked her. Dib, honestly, just wanted to go home.

After the class was dismissed and Dib managed to lose Keef by asking him to go check if he had forgotten his pen and then promptly running as fast as he could in the opposite direction, Dib walked down the concrete paths back toward his house. The sidewalk was cracked, and the houses that passed by were worn but lived in. Dib didn’t exactly have a car, but the college he was going to was within walking distance, so it was only a slight inconvenience. He had to deal with the weird looks by locals, the heat beating down on him under his leather trench coat, and his lungs protesting at any sign of physical exertion, but other than that it was fine. Dib only had three places he needed to go regularly (school, his dad’s house, and the store) and everywhere else he took his ship to for investigations. He had a chance to really examine the city and notice the details of where he passed. To be perfectly honest, Dib liked the walks between wherever he was going and wherever he needed to be, because it gave him time to wind down and think. Everything was always so loud around him Day-to-Day. Something was always happening, whether it was his home, his theories, or his family.  
Speaking of loud, Dib approached his house. He could hear shouting and arguing and shrieking and cheering all from inside. He stared at his abode, exhaustion rushing across him. The lopsided metal house with a men’s bathroom sign on the front door, and intimidating lawn gnomes sprinkled across the yard. Home sweet home, ever since Zim went missing and he needed to move out of his dad's house. It started as Dib staking the place out and waiting for Zim.. and now all of his mail gets sent there too. Dib opened the door, and was greeted by cacophonous noise.  
The Scary Monkey Show was blasting at full volume, and Gir was sitting on the couch, shrieking with laughter. The computer seemed to be arguing with Tak’s AI over the speakers in the living room. Minimoose was floating there, yelling for seemingly no reason. A sigh escaped the boy’s lips, and he shut the door behind him. He glanced up at the speakers on the ceiling.  
Zim’s ship was gone when he arrived, so it left his parking space in the attic open for Dib to park his own ship. He had figured that both Tak’s Ship and Zim’s Computer needed some company, so Dib had hooked Tak’s AI up to the house pretty soon after he officially moved in. She now lived half in the house, and Dib was now allowed to refer to the ship as his instead of Tak’s. But only when she wasn’t in it.  
Usually The Computer and Tak’s ship got along, making fun of anyone and everyone that they saw and watching bad teen soap operas on the living room Tv. They would act like normal snarky teens, but if those teens were robots and also living in your circuitry and controlling your house. Dib was glad she wasn’t stuck in his ship 24/7, since it made her less generally angry, but Dib was starting to regret uploading her to the house at times like this when he couldn’t escape her yelling.  
“MARY!” Gir screamed, running over and hugging Dib’s leg. Gir began climbing up his leg, and jumped to wrestle Dib’s backpack into a hug as well. Dib sat the backpack on the ground while Gir tunneled into its contents. “It’s nice to see you too, Gir.” He hummed. Dib reached down to pat his head and pull a pencil from his mouth. A laugh escaped from the robot, like the pencil had been holding it in. This was so normal for them that neither of them had even noticed the yelling aside from when Dib had come in.  
After giving Gir a once over, Dib decided that he’d have to give Gir’s costume a bath pretty soon. It was raggedy and dirty as the head hung around his neck like the hood of a hoodie. Dib usually avoided cleaning things, and Gir absolutely refused to take his costume off fully since Zim, but Gir’s suit hadn’t been washed since Gir had shown back up at the base.  
Gir had shown up at the base about a month after Zim went missing. It honestly worried Dib at the time. Zim wouldn’t just abandon the oh so dependent SIR unit when he ran away, would he? Maybe Gir had gotten lost, and while he was gone Zim was forced to leave. That didn’t seem like him, to just abandon Gir, but it was a possibility. It didn’t seem like Zim to just abandon his base or his nemesis, either. Maybe Zim and Gir were on an adventure, and Gir got lost so he came home? A lot of Dib’s theories had to do with Gir getting lost, because the other options were abandonment or Zim being.. not alive. Dib pushed that thought to the back of his head. That wasn’t something he wanted to go on a spiral about, it usually ended bad. He had already gotten as much as he could out of interrogating Gir. Which was… nothing, actually. Gir was impossible to interrogate, but he didn’t seem worried about Zim at all. That meant he probably wasn’t in immediate danger of dying when Gir left, so that could go either way.  
“Stupid Smelly Ugly Human!” Taks Ship shrieked from the speakers above. “Tell This fool that Humans shed their faces every ten years for a new face! As a natural disguising mechanism!”  
“What??” Dib blinked incredulously. The thought made him nauseous. He turned back to the ceiling again. “No?? Who told you that??”  
“GAZ HUMAN.”  
“Oh, Yea, she’s an ass.” Dib shrugged. “She was messing with you and that’s totally untrue.”  
Tak’s AI shrieked at having been proven wrong. Minimoose yelled louder.  
Dib crouched to grab his homework from his bag (of which Gir was nestled inside, now waiting to spring out like a snake in a can) and tossed it on a shelf where Gir couldn’t reach it. He had to, if he didn’t want him to eat it. He wasn’t about to explain to his professor again that his robot dog ate his homework. Dib even had a special shelf right above what used to be the robot parents closet that was Gir-proofed, thanks to the computer. It was less effective when the computer wasn’t paying attention to Gir trying to get on the shelf.  
It had taken a lot of convincing, and a lot of bribery, but after Dib moved in, he finally convinced Computer to let him redecorate. It wasn’t hard with the Computers help, since all the house had to do was rearrange some wires. Dib had made it so there was an actual bathroom instead of a toilet in the kitchen, and an actual kitchen. While he was making it more suitable to live in, Computer had even let him add an upstairs and a room for himself. Dib was grateful for the help, but the computer still had a strict policy on what parts of the house were off limits. Most of the places he wasn’t allowed was just tech having to do with the house, or parts of the lab that Zim locked forever once he left. It was pretty annoying that Dib couldn’t even explore his own house, though he begrudgingly understood. It was also a shame because Dib would love to study that alien tech. Unfortunately, the Computer was pretty good at keeping all of that tech running without help, so he couldn’t convince the other that it was necessary for him to delve into the catacombs of wires and circuits.  
Dib walked over to the kitchen that was connected to the living room and sat at the kitchen table. Gir scrambled from across the room to sit across from him. The human pulled out a notebook from his trenchcoat and started taking notes on the supplies he needed to upgrade the ship. He needed a supply of the same Irken metal used to make the interior of the ship, and he needed something to refrigerate it. Water wouldn’t work. Liquid nitrogen maybe? Dib noticed vaguely that everyone had started to quiet down, and the tv had turned on. Dib yawned, and Gir stared blankly at him from across the table. This.. Gir was like this sometimes. He did that. He.. right. List. He was listing things. What was he listing again? When did his head get in his arms? Uhg, his glasses hurt when he laid down. What…. was he doing again?  
Dib woke up a little bit later on the kitchen table. Ah, damnit.  
Dib got up to stretch. A glance around, and he saw Gir (at least pretending to be) asleep on the couch. Minimoose was making dinner, and the AIs had gone quiet. They were probably watching the show that was playing on the tv. Something about zombies and singing. Dib smiled softly, rubbing his tired eyes. Dib grabbed a drink and went to the kitchen table to finish his homework. Minimoose always made the best Mac and cheese


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dib finds an alien.

After dinner, Dib had plugged Gir in to charge and headed up to his room for bed. Dib's room was pretty similar to what his room was in his old house. He had a desk, two windows (one against the wall and one above his bed), a bunk bed with the bottom bunk drowned in papers, and a large tech station against the front wall. Dib approached it, hitting a few buttons. This was what he referred to as his Zim Finder. It was a few computers attached to a few stolen satellite dishes, and the whole thing was covered in scribbled over sticky notes. It picked up any and all transmissions from space and logged them for when Dib got home. Dib figured this would be the best way to find Zim, since the first time he had found and met him by detecting transmissions. It also worked as a regular computer.  
Dib sat, and a few clicks suddenly flushed Dib with excitement. Dib was getting close to finding Zim. He was so close he could taste it.  
He had been picking up transmissions from the hive minds for about a week now, being sent to earth. The hive minds hadn’t sent any transmitions anywhere near this side of the galaxy for years, but now it was finally happening. Dib wasn’t able to decode what they were saying, but he knew without a shadow of the doubt that it was from them. For years, Dib never knew if Zim was alive or not, but now he knew. Zim had to be alive.  
Dib rushed over to his desk and grabbed a small box, then finally, after years, pushed the button. Dib was buzzing in his seat. It was an Irken distress beacon he had snatched from Tak’s ship. Years of planning was coming to fruition. He felt like he was vibrating from excitement. Dib knew that Zim was on earth, and finally active- and he also knew that Zim was too curious and nosey to just ignore Irken tech broadcasting itself. Dib's smile widened. His stomach was in knots. He dropped the small black box into his trenchcoat pocket. It was a trap, and he knew Zim was on his way. Finally, he had some sort of lead in this investigation, and that lead was his golden ticket to a familiar alien. An alien that Dib refuses to admit that he misses.  
An alien that Dib really hoped didn’t abandon hi— Gir on purpose.  
Shit, what was he actually going to do when Zim showed up?  
Dib was forcefully yanked from his thoughts once again when his phone rang. Touch-Tone Telephone blasted from the device as he scrambled for it, and Dib finally found the black square. It was a call from Gaz. Dib put her on speaker, and sat the phone aside.  
“Gaz you won’t believe it! I finally have some transmissions from the Irken Impire’s hive minds, that’s means they’re talking to someone Irken on earth—“  
“Oh yea.” Gaz cut in sarcastically. She stopped his rolling excitement like a brick wall. She sighed, but it sounded more like a groan. “A huge break in the case. I know. You tell me every week. You’re days away from finding him. You have been everyday for years.”  
“But Gaz-“  
“Dib, stop it.” She snapped. “I didn’t call to ask about your obsession. You promised not to bring up your weird studies during your weekly health check.”  
“Yea, But—“  
“Dib.”  
“Okay, Okay. Fine.” Dib sighed. He minimized the readings on the computer, and he fiddled with the keys on the keyboard as he listened to Gaz. There wasn’t much he could do now but wait anyway. Remember Dib, don’t get your hopes up. You always do this.  
“Have you been taking your medicine?”  
“Yes.”  
“You realize if you’re lying I’m going to go over there and kick your ass, right?”  
“Yea, I know. You tell me every week.” Dib stopped to glance over at the pill bottle on his desk. He had been taking his medications, but he really didn’t see a point in it. He knew his family thought it was important though, so he did. It was only something to try and battle the depressive episodes he gets, at least. He wasn’t trying to cure any ‘crazy’ they thought he had. “Hey, I’m going to space tomorrow night to pick up some parts. Do you want me to pick up a video game for you while I’m out?”  
“Duh.”  
“Cool. Just swing by tomorrow to pick it up. You owe me 20 bucks.” Dib smiled, even though he knew Gaz couldn’t see him “How’s school going?”  
“Uhg, it sucks, like usual. I wish dad would just let me do online school.”  
“He’s probably just worried about your socialization. You’re not exactly friendly with the other kids your age.”  
“Shut up. All the other kids in my grade are dumb and boring. What’s the worst that could happen if I had online classes?”  
“Well, I never had any friends in school,” Dib mumbled innocently, “and you wouldn’t wanna turn out like your crackpot brother.”  
“Damn right I wouldn’t.” Gaz huffed confidently. He knew she meant it as a playful jab, so he smiled. Believe it or not, these chats did cheer him up.  
Dib listened as Gaz complained about how Mrs. Bitters was forcing her to redo a math test she had failed because she spent all night trying to beat a phone game she had, and didn’t study. Gaz listened to Dib complain about how he bought some parenting books and some pet books to see if he could get Gir to behave better, but Gir ate them. It was nice. Dib was happy that he could stay connected with his sister like this even after he moved out. Besides, it’s not like Gaz was going to let him go Scott free and leave her all alone in that big empty house without at least a little push back.  
About an hour later, Gaz had to hang up because her pizza rolls were done, and Everything was ready on his Zim Finder to notify him if a pak came anywhere near the house. Dib looked at the clock. It was 1 a.m. Dib sighed and hung his trench coat on the hook of his door before changing into a not too dirty pair of pajamas. He had napped earlier, but Gaz has a rule that he had to at least sleep a few hours a night to try and keep the habit up. Sometimes it was harder than others, but Dib felt like tonight wasn’t going to be one of those nights. Weight tugged at his eyelids, and he plopped down into bed. Dib was asleep in no time.  
The distress beacon silently chimed away in Dib’s coat pocket.

Dib’s alarm blared. He got up, got dressed in anything he could find, and grabbed his coat. He brushed his teeth, had some coffee, and packed his homework. He made sure Gir was where he was supposed to be, had some more coffee, and headed out. It wasn’t until Dib was at school when he realized that the beacon was still in his pocket, and the light on it was still slowly blinking.  
That woke Dib up more than the coffee could’ve. He sat at attention. Shit, he meant to leave that at home. With the Irken detectors.  
Shit. Fuck. Okay.  
Okay, he just had to make it through his classes today. He doubts it would take Zim less than a day to actually navigate to the distress signal, thanks to his years of hiding, but Zim was full of surprises. He probably wouldn’t want to break his cover so suddenly after so long. Dib couldn’t go home now, since his required attendance class was the last class of the day, and his dad would know if he skipped it. His dad would ask questions, and he didn’t want to open the whole “I skipped class looking for Zim” wound again. Dib would just have to keep an eye out today through his classes, patrol around during his breaks, and hope that Zim wouldn’t come right away to find him.  
Dib sat through his first class, and nothing happened.  
He patrolled the halls, and found nothing on the roof.  
Then Dib sat through his second class, and nothing happened.  
Fuck, was this actually working?  
This continued to happen throughout the day, until Dib was sitting in his bioengineering class with no trace of Zim. Keef picked up right away that something was up. And so, Keef asked, “What’s up?”  
“What? Nothing is up,” Dib said, a little too fast.  
Keef scooted closer. “You’re lying. Your face gets sweaty when you lie.”  
“I’m not lying," Dib lied, face sweaty.  
Keef narrowed his eyes.  
“Okay.” Dib sighed quietly. His voice dropped to a whisper, and he leaned closer “I’m.. doing some research is all, and I’m waiting to go home so I can finish it.” It wasn’t…. totally a lie.  
Keef smiled “Oh! Cool! What type of research?”  
Dib sat in silence. He thought, for a second, maybe, he should tell Keef. I mean, Keef was as involved in Zim’s life as Dib was, and a fresh pair of eyes never hurt. It’s not like Keef had enough sway that Dib would be called crazy if Keef thought so. Keef was just Keef, the slightly creepy kid that knew too much about people and sat at the back of the class. Even if he didn’t believe him about the alien stuff, he knew that Zim was missing and Dib was trying to figure out what happened.  
“Hey, Keef, I-“  
A scuttling.  
“Yes?” Keef asked, eyes sparkling. Keef leaned in uncomfortably close.  
A chirping. Dib stood- “Cover for me if the teacher says anything” -and rushed out of the room. Keef waved and gave him a thumbs up, even if Dib wasn’t looking back to see it.

Dib knew that scuttling. It was pak legs. 

Dib knew that chirping. It was Irken. 

Dib gripped the straps on his backpack, watching and listening while he ran. He heard the scuttling from the vents. Okay, It was in the vents. He could try and crawl up there after him. He could chase him in near the furnaces, and while his antennae were thrown off by the vibrations of the fan- He turned the corner, and the vent was hanging open. A green flash swept down the hall. Dib stumbled, and followed it faster. That plan was out the window.  
Dib had learned a long time ago that an Irken’s biggest weakness was its own need to complete orders. They would do it, even if it was obviously a bad idea. They didn’t have any free thinking when it came to split second decisions or high stress situations; it was all up to their programming. If they didn’t like you, and you said to do something, they would do the opposite without even thinking. Dib had used this a few times on Zim when they were younger, but Zim caught on pretty fast. Still, when they were in particularly high speed chases, Dib could say something, and Zim would do the opposite out of built-in spite.  
“Shit.” He gasped aloud “I sure hope he doesn’t go left.”  
The green flash went left without hesitation. Dib smiled while he pulled something from his bag. Irkens are easy to trick once you’re around them long enough. Dib turned the corner, wielding his water pistol at the ready. He was pointing the toy at the little green robot-bug he just successfully cornered. The alien hissed at him.  
The Irken in front of him was… well, square was the best descriptor. He was taller than Zim, but still short, with a flat topped head and small square body. Despite the muscle, the thing looked… bland. Dib decided that he was looking at the Irken society’s version of a paper pusher.  
“Wh—“ Dib blinked. He raised the toy up higher like he was about to shoot it. “You’re not Zim!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dib gets to the bottom of this and accidentally gets a promotion.

“You’re not Zim.” Dib stated, holding the water gun, ready to shoot. The Irken’s antenna perked in interest. It’s movements were slow and calculated as it raised its arm to its face. It opened its mouth to speak into its wrist, and Dib heard a few chirps and clicks come from it.  
“Okay, Rude.” Dib scoffed. “We’re called humans, actually.”  
It’s antennae raised more in alarm. “You know Irken?” The thing finally said. The words were foreign in its mouth, like when Zim first landed on earth.  
“Some of it. I can recognize insults. What are you doing here? You’re not an invader.” Dib said.  
“How do you—“ the alien reached for its belt. Dib tapped the trigger, and its hand was sprayed in water. It let out a hiss and shook off the smoke, watching as its own skin rapidly healed. Water didn’t leave lasting damage, but Dib would assume it hurt like hell given the times he’s seen it happen.  
“The symbol on your badge. Duh. The symbols show your jobs. I don’t recognize it, but I know it’s not an invader symbol. You’re here for something else.”  
On the alien’s shirt, there was indeed a small pink and gold badge. It had the regular triangle with the antennae insignia on it to represent Irk, but instead of the circle in the middle being full black, it had three pink dots. It reminded Dib of the lights on the Irken paks.  
Dib continued talking. “You’re obviously not trained for field work, because if you were you would have already escaped by now. You’re strong, but slow. Not soldier material. You’re not an invader, and you’re not a soldier, so there’s no reason for you to be on an unconquered planet. ” the Human boy said confidently.  
“Who…. are you?” The alien asked, eyes wide. “You shouldn’t know this. You’re just a human.”  
Dib smiled. With the pump of his gun, he spoke, triumph in his tone, “I’m Dib Membrane. The protector of earth. You may know me.”  
The alien stared. A beat of awkward silence passed.  
Dib was offended. “You- you don’t know me.”  
“....No.”  
“Seriously? Come on. Dib Membrane? From earth? Son of Professor Membrane? None of this rings any bells?”  
“No, it doesn’t.”  
Dib groaned. Dib really hoped he was at least a little famous on Irk. The Irken seemed unimpressed with him until he raised his gun again. “So, I’m guessing you’re the one the hive minds have been sending signals to?” Dib huffed.  
“...Yes.” The Irken said slowly.  
“Okay. Good, you’re cooperating. What’s your name, position, and mission here on earth.”  
The alien stayed quiet, but when Dib pumped the gun again, he jumped. This guy wasn’t trained for interrogation like the invaders were. Dib kinda felt bad. It felt like he was just threatening some guy off the street.  
“I’m a Locator. Locator Tudd. Don’t attack me. I was just sent here to make sure Zim is dead.”  
Dib’s heart skipped a beat.  
“What?”  
“Zim. Invader Zim, you seem to know him. He disappeared from Irken scanners a few years ago, and his near constant calls stopped coming since then. The almighty tallest are pretty sure he’s dead, but whenever they think that, he always comes back and destroys stuff, so they sent me to make sure.”  
Dibs shoulders slackened. Okay, so they were just guessing. Just like he was. They had no proof Zim wasn’t okay. “Oh, he’s not dead.” Dib laughed.  
“He’s not?” Tudd asked, voice edging with fear. Dib noted that for later.  
“No, I mean, he couldn’t be. I’ve seen him survive.. everything. Zim didn’t die. He wouldn’t dare if I wasn’t there to turn him in to the authorities.” He chuckled. Dib’s tone was light hearted to brush off the scary thoughts of the Locator being right.  
“I don’t know what those are.” Tudd said seriously. He stood up straighter, and glanced Dib up and down. “But.. you appear to be a Zim hunter, yes? That is why you know so much about Irk. You have been hunting Zim.”  
“Yes, I could call myself that. I think of myself more of a nemesis—“  
“And when was the last time you saw him?”  
“.. a few years ago.”  
“And What leads do you have on his whereabouts?” Tudd pulled up a small screen. It projected holographically from his wrist, and he began to write on it. All fear had since left his posture and demeanor. The Locator was now in interview mode.  
“Wait wait wait.” Dib interrupted and lowered his gun. “You’re here to find Zim too, right?”  
“Yes.”  
“And when we find him, you’re not going to kill him. You’re just here to check on him to see what’s up?”  
Tudd laughed “I don’t think it’d even be possible to kill Zim. He’s Zim.”  
“...okay, we’ll come back to that later. Why don’t we just team up?” Dib smiled.  
Tudd stared at him like he was suppressing a laugh. “....Uh, No. We Irkens don’t work with lower life forms.”  
Dib made an offended grunt and watched Tudd scribble down something else.  
“Oh fuck you, I know The Tallest.” Dib snapped suddenly. This must’ve caught Tudd off guard, because the hologram flickered away and his antennae shot straight up.  
“You know The Tallest?”  
“Uh, Yea. I’m Zim’s nemesis. Of course I know The Tallest. We’ve even talked a few times. I mean, we used to talk all the time when Zim was around. Surely if your tallest can talk to me, a lower life form, you can work with me for the time being.” Dib scoffed. His face was sweating, but the Locator didn’t seem to notice.  
Dib watched the lights on the Irken’s pak light up as he thought, and his antennae twitch subtlety.  
“..Okay. Fine. Partners.” The Alien finally resigned. He held out a claw, and they shook.  
“Good.” Dib stood up straight. He reached back, putting his gun back in his backpack. “Now, You’re going to need a disguise if you’re here on earth.”  
“You know of Irk. Do the other humans not?”  
“No. No one else thinks aliens exist.” Dib hummed. He began digging through his bag, looking for something he could use as an impromptu disguise.  
He pulled a baseball cap from his bag and tossed it at Tudd. The hat had a game controller on it. It was something that Gaz had forgotten over when they hung out some time. Tudd sputtered, very annoyed that his questions about humans were being ignored. Tudd’s attention shifted to the hat in his clawed hands.  
Dib glanced up to see the alien suspiciously examining the cap. Dib rolled his eyes and snatched the cap from him, and popped it on his head before he could protest. As the alien stumbled back, Dib shoved a pair of sunglasses onto his face. “Boom.” Dib smiled “disguise”  
Tudd grumbled for a second as he fixed the hat and glasses. He did not like this arrangement whatsoever, according his Irken. “Surely this won’t work.”  
“You’d be surprised. If anyone asks, you have a skin condition.” Dib smirked.

They were able to successfully walk off campus without anyone noticing anything strange. That still pissed Dib off somewhere in the back of his mind, but luckily it was on his side this time. They walked down the concrete sidewalks toward Dib’s house, side by side. The air was thick with tension.  
“...so, Uh. What did you mean about Zim being unkillable back there?” Dib asked. The sun blazed down on them like any other day. Dib felt so strange walking home with an Irken after so long. Especially one he barely knew.  
“Zim has been sentenced to death multiple times but it never sticks.” Tudd announced very seriously. “He always does something. He defeats the beast sent to kill him, he breaks space and time to escape doom, his pak malfunctions in just the wrong way so he can’t be deactivated. He’s a defective, and a very dangerous one. This is the second time he’s been banished, and The Tallest had to tell him it was a mission to get him to actually stay away.”  
Dib stopped in his tracks and stared. This was…. new information. It made sense, but having your theories validated with that much detail was staggering.  
“You seemed scared of him before.” Dib managed after he caught up again.  
“Naturally. He killed two tallest when he was only a smeet, and the creatures around him always end up dead or injured. Earth is just a playpen to keep him in until he ends up getting himself killed.”  
Dib shot a look at Tudd. “So earth is just a disposable place to burn for you?”  
Tudd didn’t break stride. “I had nothing to do with the decision.”  
Dib let out a low huff and ignored the fury building in his chest. They went back to walking in silence.  
After a few more minutes, they arrived at the base. “This is Zim’s home of operations?” Tudd asked.  
“Was.” Dib corrected. “I moved in after he left.”  
Confusion flashed over Tudd’s face, and Dib ignored it. Dib opened the front door. Sudden screaming poured out from inside, but Dib ignored that too. “We can use the Tv to call The Tallest.”  
As soon as the Locator entered the house, everyone seemed to go quiet. The speakers overhead went silent, and Gir sat on the couch and stared. Dib shut the door behind them and dropped his bag on the floor.  
“So.. Um. This is Tudd. He was sent here to look for Zim.”  
Everyone stayed silent. Even Gir seemed to realize the tenseness of the situation. Dib gulped, a little intimidated. “We’ve, Uh, partnered up to find him…”  
After a beat, “Finally, someone capable.” Tak’s AI scoffed, breaking the silence. The room untensed, and Dib waved Tudd over toward the screen in the living room. The human busied himself with getting Gir some crayons and paper while Tudd hooked a device up to the Tv. Tudd glanced over at Dib and Gir “is that Zim’s sir unit?”  
“....no.” Dib lied.  
Tudd didn’t believe him, but dropped it. He must’ve not cared that much. Finally, he stepped back and stood in front of the screen. Dib stood next to him. The tv flashed various colors, before The Tallest were standing there in front of them.  
“Ah, Todd. Any news on Zim?” Tallest Red asked.  
“And who’s that monkey next to you?” Tallest Purple interrupted.  
Dib took a deep breath to steel himself. He was talking to the two idiots that owned half the galaxy. “I’m Dib Membrane.”  
The Tallest glanced at each other and exchanged a few whispers.  
“We don’t know you.” Purple finally stated. Man, his voice was annoying. Dib frowned. “Dib Membrane. Seriously, none of you remember me? I was Zim’s arch-nemesis. I talked to you over his transmissions once.”  
“Ooh! The big headed kid!” Red yelled. They both laughed. Dib grumbled. At least they remembered him.  
“So you’re, like.. tall now?” Purple asked. Dib had indeed grown, now that he thought about it. He had grown to be rather tall and lanky as puberty hit him, and now he was about the same size as his dad. He thought he was going to stay short forever thanks to his weird genetics, but he shot right up shortly after Zim left. “Uh, Yea. I guess.” Dib shrugged.  
Red and Purple seemed impressed, strangely enough.  
Tudd cut in “The research on Zim has been productive. I’ve discovered he’s been missing here for as long as he’s been gone from our frequencies. I’ve partnered with this Zim hunter here for more information.”  
“Yea Yea.” Red waved his hand. He was looking off screen at a pile of snacks that had been delivered to their chambers. “We’ll send over a badge for the tall one or something. Just call us if you find Zim dead or alive... or something.”  
The call cut off. Dib’s eyes flashed between the screen and Tudd. “They’re… certainly-“ “amazing? I know.” The look Tudd gave Dib shut him right up. Right. Bad talking the Tallest was a big taboo.  
Tudd pulled out a small alien device and Dib watched it blink for a few seconds then open. It took Dib a second to realize what it was. Inside was a badge. This one was more simple than Tudd’s. It was a silver color with the basic Irken symbol carved into the front. Dib slowly took it. The metal was warm.  
“I need you to understand how important this badge is.” Tudd said, staring him down. “This should activate any Irken technology a regular Irken investigator is authorized to open. You can show it at any store in Irken territory for information. With this, you are allowed on Irk. This badge makes you officially Irken to anyone who sees it. It will be taken away at the end of our mission by the tallest themselves. Irkens are to be feared, Human. This is an incredibly high honor.”  
“Dib.”  
“What?”  
“Dib. My name is Dib. Not human.”  
The Irken sighed. He looked almost pained to say it, but he did in fact give a very unenthusiastic “Welcome to the armada, kid. Your official mission is to assist me in finding any irrefutable evidence in the case of, missing and presumed dead, Invader Zim.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dib does some errands

“Computer, can you please make sure Tudd doesn’t do anything while I’m gone?” Dib asked aloud. He was inside the ship, flipping the twitches and dials as he prepared for take off. “I don’t trust him in the slightest. I’m taking Gir with me, so you don’t have to worry about him. Don’t let him anywhere near the lab or my room, no matter what credentials he has. Investigators orders.”  
“Wow, you’re already letting this go to your head,” the Computer groaned. Gir scrambled into the back of the voot, and Dib helped buckle him into his Hello Kitty car seat.   
“C’mon, please? You don’t want him to mess with your programming or anything," Dib pleaded.  
“Fiiiine. Uhg. But I’m not cleaning up after him. That’s your responsibility.”  
“Thanks.” Dib smiled. The ceiling opened, and Dib’s ship rose into the air.  
A few hours before, Dib had gone over everything he had on Zim. Tudd listened intently while Dib listed his leads and information. Dib was actually pretty grateful to have someone listening to his theories for once. Alas, right after, Tudd marked off almost everything Dib had, saying it was either irrelevant or totally wrong. Tudd had made a list of what they had left.   
-A few years ago, Zim had mysteriously stopped going to Skool during their senior year. Dib went to check on his base after a few days of silence, and it was abandoned. Everything was off, but turned on automatically once Dib entered.   
-According to the Computer, Zim had sealed certain parts of his lab and left in his voot with Gir. Dib woke Computer a few days later. Zim could’ve come home in those few days after his ship went missing, but it was unlikely.   
-All signs pointed to Zim fleeing the planet, but his ship’s tracker never reported leaving the atmosphere after that, and Zim’s pak was no longer sending out signals. Either his pak had shut down, or he had made drastic modifications to it when he left, which was incredibly risky.  
-His lab, aside from the sealed parts, were left untouched. He was expecting to come home to his lab soon, or he left everything behind when he fled.   
And… that’s all they had. Not very much to follow up on. That’s when Dib had left Tudd to sort out this information with his Irken tech when he went up to his ship.   
-Gir somehow found his way home a month after Zim went missing.   
“This’ll only take a few minutes!” Dib called down to the house. The roof closed, and his voot rose sharply into the sky. Gir cheered. “Yay!! Mary, can we fight a bird in space?”  
“No, we're just picking up some parts from the nearest shopping quadrant under Irken supervision. While we’re out I wanna test out this badge thing. See if I can get some information,” Dib said. His hand idly went up to rest on his trenchcoat. The Irken badge was pinned to the inside so it wasn’t blatantly obvious he had it, in case he stumbled across anyone who was against the Irken impire.   
“Why is there a weird alien in the house?” Gir asked. Dib glanced back. Gir was chewing on the straps of his car seat.   
“Because he’s trying to find Zim, just like we are.”  
“Well he can’t do that!” Gir laughed. “Zim’s gone!”   
“Yes, that’s... why we’re trying to find him," the human sighed.   
Their ship was approaching a group of meteors. The large rocks were hurtling in circles, spinning and twirling around one another in synchronized patterns. On each meteor, there was a smallish building in a bubble and a docking port. Spaceships of various shapes and sizes flew toward and away from it while Dib watched. He grabbed the controls. Landing the ship on one of the meteors was a lot easier than it looked.   
“Nooo,” Gir giggled “Master is home! He’s just gone.”  
“Are you talking about me?” Dib furrowed his brows as he unbuckled Gir. Gir started to shake his head, but as soon as he was free he vaulted out of the seat and scrambled into the store. Dib sighed and followed after.   
The inside of the shop was covered wall to wall in scrap parts and tech. Here and there, sections of random wires and circuit boards were tossed into hampers under signs in an alien text. Dib glanced through the rows of boxes on a shelf. He couldn’t read the text on the boxes, but he saw a photo of a controller on the front, so he grabbed it. This was at least on the same system that the last game he got Gaz was on, so it would probably work. Even if he didn’t know anything about the game. When Dib approached the counter, Gir was already there with an arm full of random food. Dib lifted him up so he could drop it on the counter with the game. “Hey Yaezeal.”  
The alien standing at the counter was orange and tubby with four humanoid arms. Each finger had a large suction cup on the end, and their skin was spotted with dark orange dots. The top of its head was sprinkled in eyes, and the bottom half was sprouting in various tubes. Dib always thought their head looked sort of like an octopus, but with tubes instead of tentacles, and also way too many eyes.   
“Ah… Human,” Yaezeal said, turning toward him. They looked at the stuff on the counter, “Iz thees all?”  
Dibs smiled awkwardly. "Actually, could I have about ten four by four squares of Irken steel?”  
The alien sighed, and turned toward the back room. In the meantime, Dib patted Gir on the head. Gir made a happy noise. When Yaezeal returned, they were holding the packaged metal under their arm like it was cardboard. “You know, I always wondered where you got that stuff,” Dib hummed.  
“Do nout aesk queestions you do nout want to know ze answeer to,” Yaezeal stated. Dib hesitantly nodded, and opened his coat to pull out his wallet.   
“Thaet will bee 20,560 credeets.”   
“What?” Dibs voice cracked. Something metal fell to the floor, and Gir leaped down to grab it.  
“Irken steel is expensive,” Yaezeal said.  
“But- You’re kidding. It wasn’t that expensive last month.”   
“Prices raise. Stock markeet," he grunted.  
Dib crouched and lifted Gir back up, sitting him on the counter. In Gir’s little claws was Dibs Irken badge. Yaezeal watched in horror as Dib casually took it from Gir and pinned it back to the inside of his coat.  
“Youu knaow what? Free," the alien announced with sudden warmth.  
Dib looked up. “Um... What.”  
“Free. Taeke eet.”   
“Are- are you sure?” Dib asked, stunned. The alien clerk hurriedly pushed everything on the counter into a bag.   
“Yaes. Taek it and leeave.”  
Dib nodded slowly. “Um, thank you.”   
Gir grabbed the bag, while Dib took the metal sheeting. They were almost out to the ship when Dib popped his head back in the store. Yaezeal jumped.  
"Hi, um,” Dib said hurriedly, “one more question. Just, off the top of my head, y’know. Um, is this thing important at all?” Dib lifted his keychain, where the small alien device was hanging.   
Yaezeal examined it from afar for a second, before finally saying, "Thaet is ae... Irken converter. Eet es... notheeng. Eet es used in anytheeing high class Irken scieentists touch. Attack sheips, cloning macheens, coffee makeers… eet es… incredibley common.” They nodded finally.   
Dib paused then smiled. “Thanks again Yaezeal!”  
Dib got in his ship with Gir and finally flew off.  
Yaezeal let out a tense breath. “... Tourists.”

Dib landed the ship, and Gir was the first to hop out with half of the food loose in his arms. Dib followed shortly after with the rest of the food in a plastic bag with Gaz’s game. He left the metal in the ship as he went downstairs.  
“Tudd! I got some Fundip from the—- Oh my god”  
Dib walked in on Tudd in the living room, and the living room was wrecked. Dib’s stuff lay scattered all over the floor. His backpack was emptied, and any and everything that wasn’t nailed down was in the mess.  
“My shit!” Dib shrieked. The bag fell to the floor with everything else, and he rushed forward. “What the fuck, man!!”  
Tudd looked up casually. He was looking through one of Dibs college books. “Your Computer would not let me leave the room. I needed to search for clues. This is Zim’s base.”  
“No, this is my house!!” Dib threw his arms in the air.   
Tudd calmly stood up. “I could not find any worthwhile evidence, but with the leads, I have a theory.”  
Dib fell to his knees. “This will take so long to clean up...”  
“My theory is that one night, Zim was planning for a long mission to another earth land mass for supplies. He shut down his lab and base because he knew you would snoop while he was gone. While traveling over the big earth water, his piece of junk ship broke down and he died. His Sir unit, with no master, flew home from the wreckage.”   
Dib slowly looked up, processing what Tudd had said. “... I really need to get you a dog cage or something for when I leave, Jesus Christ.” He stood. "And that theory is wrong. Zim isn’t dead. Besides, he made a waterproof coating a few years back for his skin-“  
“And his pak?” Tudd cut in. Dibs mouth thinned into a line. Tudd sighed “I don’t know why you refuse to believe that Zim is dead. Most likely, he is. Given his Irken history, he would never stay quiet for this long. Maybe it is because you are looking for something else to hunt. You were not able to kill Zim and as a Zim hunter that makes you a failure. But I will not tell. You can convince the other humans that he died because of you, and I will leave forever. We will both win.”  
“That’s- that’s not it.” Dib said sharply. “That— I just know he’s alive, Okay? I can feel it.”  
“Is this an ability humans have?” Tudd asked. Dib’s tight-lipped silence was a good enough answer.   
With a sigh, Dib quietly began to clean. He didn’t want to have this argument right now. He just needed more time to think. Tudd trotted over to a screen on the wall and began to input Irken passwords to try and unlock anything of Zim’s.

After the living room was clean enough, and Dib had cooled down, Dib approached Tudd. “Anything working?”  
“No,” Tudd sighed. “Zim’s processors are so overridden with his own programming that none of the built in passwords even work anymore. We’d need an expert to unlock his files.”  
Dib squinted at the computer. Those were all the encrypted files that Computer wouldn’t let him touch. I guess Tudd had an override for it. He had to remember to yell at him later, after they figured this out.  
The door suddenly opened, and Gaz walked in. Tudd screamed and scrambled for a disguise.  
Gaz watched him try to dive under the sofa for a moment before stepping forward and completely ignoring him. “Sup’ losers. I’m here for my game.”  
Dib lit up. “Gaz! My darling, sweet, younger sister of which I have a gift for-“  
Gaz glared him down. "What do you want.”  
Dib’s smile faltered “Uh… Can you see if you can hack these files for us?”  
Gaz stood there for a second, then picked up the plastic bag off the ground. She pulled out the video game box from within, and examined it. “You dented the box. But fine, I guess. After you feed me.”   
Dib grinned. "Thanks Gaz. You’re the best.”  
“I know," she hummed, already heading to the kitchen. She sat at the table while Dib dumped the rest of the alien snacks in front of her. Gir scrambled up onto her lap to reach for a packet of pop rocks.  
“Soo…” She ripped open a bag of cake bites. “You got a new alien?”  
Dib gave an awkward smile. "Um, no. He’s just here to help me look for Zim. His leaders sent him to check on him since he’s been missing for so long.”   
“Why do you even need Zim then?”  
“Um… what.” He laughed. She rose a brow.  
“You already have an alien in your living room. He’s just as bad as hiding, and probably less batshit. You can just turn him into the government and get your blue ribbon, or whatever.”  
Dib stared at a particularly interesting bag of alien chips. Gaz watched him stare. She sighed. “Whatever. I’ll help you find your boyfriend, but just this once. We talked about this honesty thing. Just say you miss him and you don’t wanna kill him anymore.”  
“Wh- he’s NOT MY BOYFRIEND,” Dib squeaked. Gaz cringed at the sudden volume. “And I do want to kill him! I totally do. I don’t miss aliens! They're... aliens!“  
“You cried when your alien cat ran away.”  
“That’s different.” Dib sighed.   
Gaz stood. “Whatever, you idiot. Let’s get to work.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tudd finds Zim.

Two humans, an alien, and a robot were all crowded into Dib’s room as they surrounded the Zim Finder. Gazaline’s fingers tapped and padded at the keys in between her sips of Sci-fi Red Bull.   
Tudd had since realized that Gaz had both known about aliens, and known Zim. His disguise was tossed aside, in favor of his electronic notepad. Unfortunately, any and all interrogation efforts ended with a murderous glare from her and a fist in his face, so Tudd decided he could trust Dib’s word on what she knew and what she didn’t.  
Gir was playing with one of his stuffed donkey toys while climbing up and down Dib. Dib ignored the little robot. “Can you hack it?”  
“Don’t say hack,” Gaz scoffed, “you sound like a Disney channel movie. But yea, I can get past his weird ass coding redirects. He’s not a good programmer. It looks like he just plugged in a bunch of random letters and hit scramble.” She scoffed again. “It’ll take me a minute, but it’s possible with the little guy’s administrative codes.”  
Dib impatiently leaned forward, tapping his fingers against the table. Tudd made an offended grunt, saying he wasn’t THAT small.   
Gaz shot a glare in their direction. “Why don’t you just go sit down somewhere in silence? I’m sorta busy here.”   
That was enough to scare them both into just sitting down and staying quiet. Dib played with Gir, while Tudd took notes on his little holographic notepad. Gaz tapped away at the computer keyboard. Dib appreciated the silence.  
“Done," she said suddenly. They all jumped up and looked over from where they had been sitting. With a kick of her legs, she pushed her chair back and cracked her knuckles. On the screen there was an open file. Dib scrambled closer. The file was written in Irken. Dib dictated aloud for Gaz. “The file is named 'Plan E.' and there's one message in it. ‘For the Locator sent to find me. QOVULUPZHOVTVWOVIL’. What the hell does that mean?”  
“That was his training quadrant,” Tudd supplied. They both looked at him.  
“I did at least a little research before getting here, Irk Be Pleased.” He huffed   
“That seems like a little too obvious of a password for Zim to use,” Dib said aloud.  
“You didn’t figure it out.” Gaz rose a brow.  
“Well I didn’t know his quadrant!”  
“Then I guess it would have only been figured out by a Locator.” She huffed.  
Dib frowned. “Lets just… figure out where this password goes.”  
Dib paused to think. Where was somewhere they could input a password?  
“Oh! I remember this!” the little robot yelled from the ground behind them. Dib turned and scooped up Gir, excitement growing in his chest. Gir gave a happy wiggle. “You do?”  
“Yes!! Master is downstairs! In the lab!” He cheered. Gir hopped from Dib’s arms and scrambled downstairs. Dib stumbled, but ran after him. They all followed, Gaz,albeit, at her own pace. The computer opened the tunnels and elevators wherever Gir led them, in a maze throughout the base. Gir was giggling wildly. It wasn’t long until Dib had no idea where they were.   
“Oh my god,” Dib whispered excitedly, “I can’t believe it. Zim’s down here? That’s what he said, right? Zim is down here?”   
Gaz shushed him.  
After a short while and a very long walk, they were standing in front of a pair of doors. The hallway they were in was dimly lit and empty. Tudd slowly walked forward and typed in the password on the keyboard next to the door. Dib took a deep breath. Gir tilted his head, oooing.  
The doors opened. A flashlight rose from Tudd’s pak, and Dib pulled out his phone light just as fast.   
It was a metal room with a charging port for a pak, and an empty metal box that said ‘rations’. The letters on the wall said “Secret Hideout.” It was a room with the Irken necessities and nothing more. Aside from the Irken skeleton in the middle of the floor, the room was bare.  
Dib dropped his phone.   
Tudd calmly approached the skeleton and prodded the bones. “Yep those are Irken.”  
“That… that isn’t Zim. It can’t be.” Dib let out a small laugh. He took a shaky step forward into the room. The closer he got, nothing changed.  
Tudd picked the skeleton up by the head, and the rest of the bones scattered to the floor. The pak thunked in the center. Dib cringed.   
“Yep,” Tudd said, pointing to a number on the back of the skull. “That’s Zim’s serial number.”  
Dib fell to his knees. This couldn’t be happening.  
“Ew, you have a number carved into your skull?” Gaz asked.  
“No, they appear naturally. It’s programmed into our DNA by the control brains.” Tudd answered, waving his hand. He dropped the skull. It clattered against the ground and broke.   
Dib started crying. Gaz crouched down next to Dib and hesitantly patted his shoulder. Gir wandered off, quietly singing a song.   
“Well, my work is done here.” Tudd said.   
“That… I-It can’t be… it-it’s not real. It doesn’t make sense.” Dib sobbed.  
“Oh, it makes perfect sense. It appears that Zim locked himself in this bunker and planned for a Locator to come get him a lot sooner than we did. Oh well, his own ignorance killed him.” Tudd walked back down the hall. “I found Zim, and my mission is complete. I will be upstairs compiling a report for when you are ready to talk to the tallest.” Tudd turned the corner, and Dib heard him trudge off. He then heard the elevator activating in the close distance.   
Dib let out a choked sob and pulled Gaz into a hug. She took a second to awkwardly hug back. He had gotten his hopes up. He knew better than this.   
“I… h-he was down here the whole time. I-I was looking for him... and I didn’t know... I-I…”  
“C’mon, man,” Gaz sighed. She patted his back. “There’s no way you could’ve known. You needed that guy’s administrator stuff to even know there was something up.”  
Dib didn’t know why he was upset. He wanted Zim dead, that’s why he had hunted him down like that. That’s why he had been hunting down his best friend, his only motivation, he… he…  
He missed Zim.  
Oh my god, he missed Zim.  
Dib cried harder against Gaz’s shoulder. Gir joined the pile, laughing. 

A few hours later, Dib sat puffy-eyed in front of the video chat with the tallest. Gaz had helped Dib up the elevator and into the living room, and he was currently trying to hold himself together on screen. College had made him pretty good at trying not to cry on a video call.   
“That’s amazing news!” Purple yelled.  
“Zim is dead!” Red cheered, tossing an arm around Purple.   
“Yes, we found his skeleton. Zim is dead.” Tudd said. “I’ll be flying home soon with the full report. Shall I take the human’s badge and send it back?”  
“Irk no!” Red laughed. “He killed Zim! He can keep it!”  
Dib sat up “I didn’t—“  
“You’re not only officially Irken, we’re making a holiday for you!” Purple cut in. Tudd didn’t seem to like this idea, but he didn’t say anything. Purple pulled Red into a hug and an unseen crowd cheered.  
“Okay, we’ll see you soon Todd,” Red hummed. The video call cut off, and the cheering of the background noise ended abruptly. Tudd sighed, before turning to Dib. “We worked well together.”  
He saluted, and went outside. After a moment, Dib could see his ship taking off through the window. He was gone. Just like Zim. Everything was going by so fast.  
Dib stood.   
“Dib, what’re you-“ Gaz started. Dib ran back to the certain spot on the floor, and the tubes sucked him down. She followed after.   
“Gaz, I had to have missed something!”  
“Dib you’re only making yourself more upset.”  
Dib jumped through the doors as soon as they were opened and ran off.   
Gaz sighed. She followed him slowly. “Dib...?” She turned a corner. It didn’t look familiar.  
“Computer, where’s Dib?” she snapped  
“Uhhhh,” it said, sounding hesitant.  
“Computer," she threatened   
“Okay, okay. Turn right,” the Computer groaned.  
After following Computer’s directions, she weaves through the tunnels for a good few minutes. Soon, though, she turned the corner and found Dib on the ground over top of Zim’s skeleton.   
He was laughing. Oh god, he had snapped.  
“Uh... Dib...?” Gaz asked, slowly approaching.  
Dib looked up at her with a big smile. His glasses reflected the light in a way this hid his eyes.  
“Gaz, Zim’s alive.” He laughed. He grabbed something.  
“Uhm...”  
He stood, holding up a metal hemisphere. Silver metal with three pink opaque windows, and a few wires hanging out of the back. It was Zim’s pak. “Wh-“   
With a sudden movement, he smashed it against the ground. The pink glass shattered, and Dib fell to his knees again, not caring about the glass cutting him. His hands scrambled to the metal, and he lifted the pak up. He held it upside-down, and nothing came out, aside from broken glass.  
“It’s empty. It’s a fake. I don’t understand what’s going on, but... this skeleton wasn’t Zim when it died. The pak isn’t real, and the skeleton probably isn’t either.” Dib grinned.  
Gaz blinked, eyes wide. “O… Kay. Let’s get you upstairs. You need to lay down.”   
Dib stood slowly. He let her lead him upstairs, while she cursed to herself quietly. Of course his sister thought he was back to being crazy and obsessive again. Dib didn’t care. He followed her happily. The whole time, the empty metal shell was held close to his chest, and he was still smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brownie points for anyone who can decipher Zim’s training quadrant lol


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dib figures it out and calms down a bit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha sorry for the hiatus guys!

When Gaz woke up on Dib’s couch that morning, Dib was already up. He was standing in the middle of the living across from the couch, mumbling to himself as he connected the red string on a large cork board. Gaz rubbed her eyes, and tried to sit up, but a weight stopped her. Gir was on her lap, curled up and making pretend snoring sounds. Her eyes flickered back up to Dib.  
“You didn’t sleep, did you?” she mumbled.  
Dib jumped, and his gaze snapped over to her. “No time for sleep.”  
Gaz made a small growl of annoyance. She stood, and stretched. Gir fell to the ground, and in a giggling fit, proceeded to roll around on the floor.  
“Did you at least plug in Gir?” she groaned  
“What?” Dib asked, not really paying attention. He scribbled the words ‘Mind Control?’ Onto a sticky note and pinned it to the board.  
Gaz scowled. She picked up the robot, and carried him over to his charging station, where she plugged him in. His eyes glowed brighter, and Gir giggled. The little robot contented himself with a slightly damp toy car he pulled out of his mouth, while Gaz turned to Dib angrily.  
“Dib you can’t ignore your responsibilities just because you think-“  
“-know! I know I’m right."  
“Dib-“  
“Gaz, just listen to me. I know you’ll understand once you get it!”  
Dib quickly, before Gaz could say anything else, stepped aside so he could point at the cork board. “Okay, Okay- look look look. Zim had realized that he was a defective, and his whole race hated him, right? So he-so he faked his death! He made a new pak, one that wasn’t real—“ he held up the broken and empty pak “and he— and he put it on…... No wait—“   
Gaz sighed softly.  
“He-He put it on another Irken! One that.. had the same serial number as him? No, that doesn’t work.”  
“Dib.”  
“That can’t be him. If it was, why is his ship gone?”  
“Dib!”  
“What?” Dib asked, looking over at her.   
She shoved a bag into his arms. “You’re going to be late to school.”  
“Oh.” Dib dropped his bag and laughed a little “I’m not going to school. Computer, call The Tallest!— please. Under my credentials, not Zim’s.”  
“I’m calling dad,” Gaz said, walking into the other room.  
“Calling The Tallest!” The Computer announced.   
After a few seconds, the screen flashed, and The Almighty Tallest were on the screen. Red’s arm was around Purple, while Purple was laughing and eating something unrecognizable. They both held large bottles of a pink liquid, while confetti fell from the sky. There was a party raging on behind them, and a banner that said, affectionately, ‘Zim is dead!’. The music blared, making it hard to hear.   
“Hey there hero!” Red shouted over the music. “Why are you bothering us?”  
“Zim’s alive,” Dib said simply.   
Red and Purple both froze. Purple waved his hand, and both of them moved off screen, away from the crowds. It didn’t look like any of the other Irken had heard Dib. A second later, his feed flickered and he was now looking at the tallest in another room, from one of their handheld communicators.  
“What do you mean Zim is alive?” Red hissed quietly.  
“Tudd and I— we found Zim’s skeleton in the basement of his lab. But it- it wasn’t him.”  
“How do you know?” Purple asked seriously.  
Dib looked around at the room, to his cork board. When he rolled it up to show the screen, The Tallest both looked at each other in disbelief. Dib recognized it from years of seeing it. The ‘this kid is crazy’ look. Dib gulped, his mouth going dry. His fidgeting only became worse. These two were intimidating when they needed to be.  
“Y-you see, uh, his skeleton. It had... his numbers on it. His serial numbers. But his pak—“ Dib looked around, to reach for the empty pak and show it on the screen, when something caught his eye.   
His keys were on the table.  
Dib dove for them, and held them up. His smile widened at the realization. He pointed at the blueish alien adapter. “Of course!!! Of course. Do- Do you know what this is?”   
They both squinted at it.   
“No," said Purple.  
“It looks like one of ours," Red added  
“It’s an Irken Adapter that’s only used for super high class irken scientist’s machines. Like cloning! He must’ve stolen it! The-the zim we found downstairs was a clone!”  
“Aren’t those things super common, though?” Red asked. “Aren’t they in like… coffee machines?”   
“Well, Yes, But—“  
Red held up a hand. Dib went quiet.   
Red looked pissed. Dib gulped, and Purple reached up to gently pat Red’s back.  
“Alright," Red started, taking a deep breath. His antennae were twitching in either annoyance or anger. “Let me get this through to you, Human. You found Zim dead. That means Zim is dead. Zim is not a clone. He is dead. You can’t even clone paks, Human. It would be impossible.”  
“But his pak is—“  
“Ah! No! Shut it!” Purple snapped. “Red isn’t done.”  
“Thank you, Purple,” Red mumbled. They held hands, and Red turned back to Dib. “Human. Get it through your big head! Zim. Is. Dead. Good riddance. Stop trying to pretend he’s not! You’re just causing trouble.” Red crossed his arms finally, like that was an order.   
Purple lifted up a finger to add, “And don’t call back. We’re blocking your number.” Before Dib could say anything, The call suddenly ended short.   
Dib stared at the screen, and gulped slowly.   
Okay. He didn’t need the Irken’s help. He was better off without them. He’s used to people not believing him, anyway. He’ll prove Zim is alive alone. You know what— they probably did believe him! They were just scared. Scared that Zim was okay. Just like how his classmates never believed him because they were scared of the truth.  
Dib shakily sat his keys on the table.   
Gaz came back a minute later. “Dad called your psychologist. She said you’re having an episode, and dad said I have to stay here until you’re done.”  
“I’m not having an episode!” Dib yelled. He’d talked to his therapist about it! He knew what they were! His episodes were usually just sudden bursts of manic energy that made it hard for him to sleep or eat or do anything else because he was focusing so hard on something! He wasn’t—- Ah shit He was having an episode. Gaz walked over, and started gathering all of Dib’s papers. “No more theorizing.”  
“What?! But Gaz, I just had a breakthrough! Zim is alive! That skeleton was to throw the armada off his trail!”  
“And you can continue your breakthrough once you’re done with your episode. You’re just riling yourself up.” She finally gathered up all of the papers, leaving only the pak and Dib’s keys on the table. “I don’t care if Zim is alive. He can handle himself. You need to calm down. Not Zim.”  
The Computer seemed to take the hint, as the corkboard was lowered into the ground. Gaz tossed in all the papers after it, probably never to be seen again. The ground closed up, and Gaz turned to Dib. Dib sputtered. A few excuses started to form, but he eventually ended up crossing his arms and pouting, knowing there was no way to argue with her.   
-  
A few minutes, maybe an hour had passed. Dib was currently taking apart the fake pak he had found, and adding more parts to it where he needed in it. Gaz had let him, even though it was alien related, because it kept his hands busy and his mouth quiet.   
“Well, I’m glad that Tudd fellow is gone. I didn’t like him,” Tak’s ship announced.   
A cheesy Disney Channel original movie was playing on the tv, which seemed to satisfy everyone in the room except Dib.   
“Yea. He was a huge dweeb,” Gaz agreed.   
“Nosy too,” The Computer added.  
“Nya!!” Minimoose said intellectually.   
They all mumbled agreements with him.   
The AIs went back to quietly watching the movie with Gaz. Minimoose was playing with Gir, who was in turn trying and failing to catch Minimoose. It was a nice, calm moment.  
“Hey Gaz, look," Dib said. He lifted up his new creation. He had replaced the broken glass on the pak’s windows with zippers and plastic, and added straps to the back. “I made a back-pak. Haha, get it?”  
“That’s morbid, Dib," Gaz said, straight faced.   
“Oh, like you’re one to lecture me on morbidness.” He scoffed. He put the backpak on to adjust the straps. “Besides, it can help me with stealth missions in case I ever want to go to Irk.”  
“Why would you want to go there?” Computer scoffed.   
Dib just shrugged, and went back to fiddling with it. He scooped up the excess pieces of glass he had taken from the pak, and walked over to dumb them in the trash.  
Gaz looked from the pak, to Dib for a little bit. “... So do you feel better?” She finally asked.  
Dib slowly nodded, as if he was still making sure. “Uh...Yea. Thanks for staying with me, Gaz.”  
Gaz stood. “Ha, Whatever, nerd. I’m gunna go. I have a make-up test on Monday to study for. Love you.” Gaz grabbed her alien video game box. “—And Try not to stress over Zim too much while I’m gone. Eat. Sleep. You’re an adult.” She waved her hand.  
Dib smiled softly. “Love you too. Bye. Good luck with your test and also sorry you had to miss school because of me.”  
“Eh, Whatever. It’s Friday. Not like I care.”


End file.
